Interesting way to start a turnaround season

So if you're a backup quarterback that had just slogged through a hideous scrimmage that featured tons of dropped passes, and was highlighted by such crappy special teams that the one guy they signed up just so SOMEBODY might be able to put a ball in the end zone for kickoffs breaks his damn foot, how do you cope? If you answered "go out and get yourself a DUI, spend an evening in the 'Johnny Cash Suite', and get suspended indefinitely" crack open a tall boy. Looks like I picked a hell of a week to stop sniffing glue. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a TiVo'ed preview special to watch (one drink for each time "improvement" is mentioned).